What Do Others Think About You?
Between 2016-2018 my social media posts with the most engagement all had to do with one theme: getting over the fear of what others think about us.
People really resonated with thoughts like:
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No one is spending their day criticizing you - if they are, they're not worth your time anyway
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When we realize we don't have to live our lives based on the opinions of others we're free to contribute
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I promise you there's not a group of people monitoring whether or not you're fulfilling your potential today
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We can waste our whole lives trying to meet the standards we've imagined others have for us
Why do those thoughts resonate so much?
Reading them a couple years later I still draw strength from the idea it is possible to free ourselves from the fear others are sizing us up, judging us, wondering why we're not finished with that project yet, or why we haven't hit some arbitrary life milestone.
The fact is, people are probably not thinking about you at all - but our brains won't let us relax.
This is because our brains were designed to keep us alive, not make us happy.
Have you ever wondered if you’re on the Truman Show? Be honest. I know I have.
I think everyone must know everything about me and they’re definitely thinking about me all the time. My particular brand of Truman Show anxiety looks like this:
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When I’m performing at my worst and just can’t get it together, everyone knows it
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Everyone knows about all my ambitions and they’re laughing because I think I’m capable of such accomplishments
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People definitely remember mistakes I’ve made — forever — even if it was a mistake made with good intentions
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On days I decide to take time for myself or do something differently, people have a sixth sense and intuitively know I’m being lazy
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If I’m inexperienced at something, everyone is definitely paying close attention to my missteps and regularly thinks about whether or not I have what it takes
For me and many folks I’ve worked with, what this really comes down to is our deep desire to do life right and be accepted - because we’re so terrified of doing things wrong and being ousted.
But the reality is this: very few negative experiences, and no amount of judgement from others, will bring us real harm.
Even though we know this cognitively, we still get trapped in these vicious thought cycles from time to time.
The sad thing is, most of us will never take action to address these unhelpful thought cycles because it’s all happening in our head and doesn’t directly affect anyone but us - so we don’t feel a real sense of urgency to change.
As a result, many of us deal with the discomfort, stay with these thought patterns, and never give ourselves the gift of peace.
But we must change our behaviors and our beliefs if we want to make real and tangible advancements toward inner-freedom.
I'm excited to bring back my workshop Stop Thinking About What Others Are Thinking About You to support you in changing your behaviors and beliefs about the opinions of others.
Stop Thinking About What Others Are Thinking About You
Wednesday, September 23rd
12:00pm - 1:00pm CT
We make assumptions about the judgement we receive from others because we constantly judge ourselves.
We must remember peace on the outside comes from peace on the inside and acceptance on the outside comes from acceptance on the inside.
Join us next Wednesday to work toward that peace and acceptance.
Onward!